How to Deal with Negative People


how to deal with negative people At one point in your life or another, you have to learn how to deal with negative people. Negative individuals are particularly difficult if you have to spend a lot of time with them, as might be the case if you’ve got a negative coworker or family member.

My Friend Who is a Negative Nelly

I used to have a friend who, after a while, became consumed with negativity in her life. She wasn’t a horrible person – I think she was really looking for a sympathetic ear, however,

she always focused on what she didn’t have, what she’d lost, what other people had or the ways in which other people were planning to, or had already done something bad to her. In many ways, she simply foc

used on her negative mindset, though in the past I’m sure she was a more positive person.

It wasn’t as if she’d lost her mind. From the description above, it almost sounds like it though. No, she just became so consumed by negativity that she couldn’t focus on anything else. The first time I met her husband, I had to decide to spend way less time with her – because if I thought she was negative, he was even worse! He was the k

ind of person that put her down in front of other people. Gross and abusive.

The Difficult People You Know

I’m sure you don’t have to go very far back in your own experience (this morning, maybe?) to come up with an example of how you had to deal with someone negative. Maybe you have negative co-workers, team members, a close friend or other people you have to spend too much time with, and their negative outlook is impacting you.

The Best Way For Me to Dal with My Negative Friend

I’ll admit, in my own situation, I had to resort to dropping this friend, and now I haven’t talked with her in years. For me, it was the best thing, and relatively easy, but maybe the negative people you deal with are at work or elsewhere in your life are a bit harder to say goodbye to.

If that’s the case, here are some ideas on how to deal with negative peopl


How To Deal With Negative People

Here are some tips on dealing with negative people. However, recovering from the detrimental impact they’ve already had on you may require more work, including the help of a counselor.

1. Don’t Get Sucked Into The Negative Energy. Be around negative people as little as possible. Structure your day or tasks so that you can avoid dealing with these people as much as you (responsibly) can. If you do have to be around a negative attitude, look to tip 2.

2. Float. If you have to be around them, try to float above the negativity and negative comments. Remember that negative people are negative. They’re not going to say positive things to you or about you. They won’t have a good things to say when you talk about the game last night, or the weather – even if it’s been gorgeous for 8 days straight. When you’re working together on a project and you’ve just done something brilliant, don’t expect to be told so, and you won’t be disappointed.

I know it stinks, but complaining about what IS won’t change it.

So you don’t have to take their feedback personally. For them, every day is a bad day, and it’s a good idea to take the negative thoughts people share and not give it much power.

Get very realistic about what to expect from this person and get what you need (emotionally or more concretely) elsewhere.

3. Don’t Give an Emotional Response to Toxic Energy. Sometimes it feels like negative people are baiting you into talking about whatever they feel so upset about, just so they can vent their negativity. Maybe the topic they like to talk about on a daily basis is your boss, the latest project you’re working on, politics, or something else that is particularly sensitive for this person. If you know where the land mines are, by all means, avoid them!  For them, this is just repeating old patterns.


Remember that this behavior can have a negative impact on you. You need to stay in tune with your own higher vibrations if you don’t want their negative mood impacting your inner peace. Make a conscious effort to remove yourself from these people, set boundaries and focus on your more positive outlook.

4. Be Your Best Self and Love Them. Negative people are usually negative because they’re hurt, feel victimized, betrayed, angry and otherwise slighted by life. Sometimes, it’s a matter of their level of personal growth, or it could be the impact of a mental health condition like depression.

Sometimes a little kindness can heal that just enough to crack the egg and let a little sunshine through. Even though your higher energy might feel like it’s falling on deaf ears, you should remember that it’s proven that the little things – compliments, small talk, and general kindness – matter.

Just someone knowing you genuinely care can make all the difference. If you can form an ally this way, they may be able to make more positive changes just by knowing you, seeing your different perspective, and following your example.

5. Say Goodbye. It can be so hard to know when it’s time to say goodbye to certain relationships. But if a negative relationship is disrupting your sense of peace and mental state, impacting your sense of personal power, giving you a bad attitude or otherwise effecting your everyday life, you may have to cut off them and their toxic behavior. If it’s getting to be too much and your attempt to put up boundaries is not working, sometimes the only thing you can do is say goodbye, no matter how the person is connected to you.

6. Find positive energy elsewhere. It might be in your best interest to expand your social circles. Everyone needs emotional support, and you deserve people in your life that give you positive feedback instead of personal attacks.

Only you can make the decision about if it’s right to drop a relationship, have a serious conversation, or keep trying, but you have to take into account the serious cost that being around the effects of negativity can have on you.

You Can Learn How To Deal With Negative People Anywhere In Your Life

Negative people can leave us with negative emotions – we end up feeling angry, drained and powerless. But you can learn how to deal with negative people no matter where you find them in your life.

Taking back control is a matter of resetting boundaries and expectations, as well as coming to grips with the fact that perhaps, you won’t get what you need emotionally from this person.

If this is a co-worker, that might feel bad, but you can probably deal with it. If it’s a parent or other loved one, it might be devastating.

If you are very clear within yourself about the boundaries, expectations and emotional needs that you have, you will be much better able to deal with this person, no matter where you find them in your life.

So tell me, where are you dealing with a negative person in your life, how are you dealing with it, and how is it effecting you?


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